Hey Gang! Welp here we are. 30 days left! *pelvic thrusts* Today I'm going to pose the question: What happened??? Last night boo love cooked dinner for me and sis in law and boy did he put his foot in that food! LAWD! *waves church fan* So with good food usually comes good conversation. My sis in law is a new teacher and it's only been a week since school has been in session and boy the stories she told.... let us pray! But I posed the question of what happened? Not just to our children but to black people as a whole. This question has been burning within me for quite some time now. As African Americans, our heritage and roots come from kings and queens. We fought for justice and equality. A force to be reckoned with. We have come from Black Power and I'm Black and I'm Proud to twerking for life, sexy with voluptuous curves but the brain of a earthworm, senseless killings, epic fails, plethora face palms, and the list goes on. What happened to us as black people? And let's not even get on the whole reality T.V. tip....I know God is looking down throwing constant shade at the foolery that is projected on these shows. I'm getting tired of having to explain to my Caucasian counterparts that not all black people act like this. Sigh.... Let me attempt to dissect this here for a moment....I'm not expert or anything, I'm just speaking from personal experiences and making a few observations.
One conversation boo love, sis in law, and I had was that people, mostly black people, are shocked when asked if we have any children and the answer is no or if asked if we have a baby momma/daddy and the answer is no. I have a serious problem with this line of questioning. First, why is the question "are you married" not being asked first? Why are we being asked if we have a baby momma/daddy? Why are our goals and expectations so low? Why are we not striving for marriage and THEN a family? I know times are different where out of wed lock children are more acceptable but is this acceptance hurting us as a community. One problem is that the black family is so disoriented and almost extinct to the point where single parent homes are becoming the norm. I know there are some single parents out there not by choice and who are working there tails off and I applaud you guys. It's the other end of the spectrum that I'm referring to. One of my goals in life was to never become a baby momma. I wanted my children to be in a 2 parent home because I understood the importance of it. Which leads me to my next point....
Why are young girls/women twerking for life and our young men are killing themselves or are in jail? I'm glad you asked. Absent fathers. I didn't realize the importance of the role of a father until I got older. There is only so much a mother can teach. Women tend to gravitate towards men like their fathers or gravitate towards that void that the absent father left. Men tend to emulate the actions of their father or like the woman, attempts to fill the void of the absent father either in a positive light or in a destructive manner. It hurts my heart so see a woman define herself by her outer curves and not by the content of her character. My message to you, baby girl beauty fades. No man wants a woman that only stimulates his loins but wants a woman that can stimulate his intellect as well. *I think I said something there* Fatherless sons and daughters is real people and it's hurting us in so many facets of life.
Another consensus that we came to is that parents just seem to not care anymore and rely too heavily on teachers and other folk to raise their children. I can't say that parents are getting younger. My parents were young when they had me and I feel that they did an awesome job. The average age of a parent back in the day was 17, so that's not an excuse. My belief is that paper chasing has become more important than instilling morals and values. I'm not saying not to get your money boo boo but you have to put things in perspective. I remember growing up, my parents made sure we did our homework, showed up to parent teacher conferences, came to every choir concert, track meet, volleyball game, etc. I remember family vacations and talking at the dinner table. I remember the the encouraging words that you can be whatever you want to be as long as you put in work and pray. Now, T.V., internet, Xbox, PlayStation etc are raising our children and we know the foolery that is displayed on these venues. Shoot cartoons are even the same. SMH.
So what are we do as black folk? Are we too far gone that there is no turning back? It's really time for us to stop talking and start working. We need to mend the black family. It really does take a village to raise a child. I don't have all the answers but it is past due for change. It's time for mothers to stop blocking a father from seeing his child/children because the relationship didn't work out between the 2 of you. -_- It's time for us to raise our children and not use them as a child support check and government aid. -_- *yep I said it* It's time for us build our families on a solid foundation and be an example to our children so that they may pass the torch on to their children and their children's children. It's time for boys to become men and step up and be the father's that our children so desperately need and are yearning for. I know deep in my heart that we can do it. It's going to take a lot of hard work, determination, motivation, and inspiration but it can be done. We must hurry before the black family becomes extinct. Are you with me in the quest? These are just a few of my thoughts and I will end here. Until tomorrow loves.....
Love,
Doc J
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