First let me begin with saying that it has been a long time since I've posted anything on this blog. It was originally designed for my 31 day reset in which I have temporarily abandoned but will get back on it in the very near future. It is my sincerest hope and prayer that all that reads this is inspired, encouraged, and uplifted. *inhaling and releasing*
On December 16, I woke up a little earlier than normal to see a post on fb about a Soror that had passed. I was in total disbelief and didn't want to accept it. So I took to Twitter to verify because I knew this particular Soror was up tweeting and being sent to the corner as she was on a daily basis. I started to see the same out pour of emotions: disbelief, hurt, pain, questioning why, etc. I broke down asking Lord how could this happen? She has 2 babies. Why am I having these emotions? I've never even met her. Well let me tell you about Cryssy AKA @theuncensord1 as the Twitter world knows her. She was the sweetest, most open person I knew and was one of my favorite followers. I don't even remember how we began following one another. All I do remember is that her uncanny wit was second to none and I stayed waiting on what she was gonna say about any given subject. She was like a virtual big sister to me. It was then I understood the outcries, the hurt, the outpouring of love and compassion for Cryssy and her family.
But what touched me the most was her babies Cyd and Clarke, age 3 and 3 months. It took me back to a place that I thought I was over. I (4) as well as my 2 younger siblings (2 and newborn) were in the same place 24 years ago when our Mom passed away at the age of 25. The feeling of pain, loneliness, wanting my Mom overwhelmed me all over again because I knew exactly what Cryssy's babies were feeling and going to feel for a lifetime. Like my Mom, Cryssy loved her babies and always expressed her love for them via Twitter. From her tweets I could gather that the oldest one was just like her lol. I just want to share my testimony to her babies. When my Mom died, I remember my dad saying, "Mommy is gone to heaven now and you're gonna have to be Daddy's big girl now." Those words resonated quite often throughout my life. I stepped up as a very protective big sister but always reminded them of the memories of Mom that they never shared or were too young to remember. I always reminded them that we were our Mom's pride and joy and that her spirit and legacy is carried on through us. There will be times Cyd when you deeply miss your Mom and may even cry out for her but always remember that she is forever with you in your heart. It's alright to go to your quiet place and have a little talk with her. That warm, fuzzy feeling that you will feel at your weakest moments will be her spirit encouraging and cheering you on. There will also be times Cyd when Clarke is gonna want to know about Mom and ask why. These will be the toughest moments but pray that God will lead you to say the right things. Remember to be a great big sis to Clarke. Spoil her with love, compassion, and that toy or outfit that Daddy won't get her lol. To Clarke, I know that you will not understand things for quite some time but I can already tell that you have so much love surrounding you. This will get you through the tough times. Don't be too rough on big sis Cyd. Some times being the oldest gets hard. Always have big sis back and love her like no other. To Cyd and Clarke, do know that your mother was awesome and loved you dearly. The pain never really goes away but with God's help, He will give you strength and endurance to keep going. God always has a plan and purpose for everything He does. Know that your Mom is in a better place where there is no more pain, sickness, or sorrow or as Cyd so eloquently put it she's dancing with the angels in heaven. Always remember that you now have a whole slew of adoptive Tee Tee's and Uncles that are gonna probably spoil you beyond repair. Your Mom talked about you guys so much that we all feel that we know you. Hopefully, one day we will get to meet. But do know that your virtual family loves you and misses your Mom just as bad as you do. We will always be here for you and praying for and with you.
Love Always,
@DocBreezy08
