A Note for Cyd and Clarke

First let me begin with saying that it has been a long time since I've posted anything on this blog. It was originally designed for my 31 day reset in which I have temporarily abandoned but will get back on it in the very near future. It is my sincerest hope and prayer that all that reads this is inspired, encouraged, and uplifted. *inhaling and releasing*

On December 16, I woke up a little earlier than normal to see a post on fb about a Soror that had passed. I was in total disbelief and didn't want to accept it. So I took to Twitter to verify because I knew this particular Soror was up tweeting and being sent to the corner as she was on a daily basis. I started to see the same out pour of emotions: disbelief, hurt, pain, questioning why, etc. I broke down asking Lord how could this happen? She has 2 babies. Why am I having these emotions? I've never even met her. Well let me tell you about Cryssy AKA @theuncensord1 as the Twitter world knows her. She was the sweetest, most open person I knew and was one of my favorite followers. I don't even remember how we began following one another. All I do remember is that her uncanny wit was second to none and I stayed waiting on what she was gonna say about any given subject. She was like a virtual big sister to me. It was then I understood the outcries, the hurt, the outpouring of love and compassion for Cryssy and her family.

But what touched me the most was her babies Cyd and Clarke, age 3 and 3 months. It took me back to a place that I thought I was over. I (4) as well as my 2 younger siblings (2 and newborn) were in the same place 24 years ago when our Mom passed away at the age of 25. The feeling of pain, loneliness, wanting my Mom overwhelmed me all over again because I knew exactly what Cryssy's babies were feeling and going to feel for a lifetime. Like my Mom, Cryssy loved her babies and always expressed her love for them via Twitter. From her tweets I could gather that the oldest one was just like her lol. I just want to share my testimony to her babies. When my Mom died, I remember my dad saying, "Mommy is gone to heaven now and you're gonna have to be Daddy's big girl now." Those words resonated quite often throughout my life. I stepped up as a very protective big sister but always reminded them of the memories of Mom that they never shared or were too young to remember. I always reminded them that we were our Mom's pride and joy and that her spirit and legacy is carried on through us. There will be times Cyd when you deeply miss your Mom and may even cry out for her but always remember that she is forever with you in your heart. It's alright to go to your quiet place and have a little talk with her. That warm, fuzzy feeling that you will feel at your weakest moments will be her spirit encouraging and cheering you on. There will also be times Cyd when Clarke is gonna want to know about Mom and ask why.  These will be the toughest moments but pray that God will lead you to say the right things.  Remember to be a great big sis to Clarke. Spoil her with love, compassion, and that toy or outfit that Daddy won't get her lol. To Clarke, I know that you will not understand things for quite some time but I can already tell that you have so much love surrounding you. This will get you through the tough times.  Don't be too rough on big sis Cyd. Some times being the oldest gets hard. Always have big sis back and love her like no other. To Cyd and Clarke, do know that your mother was awesome and loved you dearly. The pain never really goes away but with God's help, He will give you strength and endurance to keep going. God always has a plan and purpose for everything He does. Know that your Mom is in a better place where there is no more pain, sickness, or sorrow or as Cyd so eloquently put it she's dancing with the angels in heaven. Always remember that you now have a whole slew of adoptive Tee Tee's and Uncles that are gonna probably spoil you beyond repair. Your Mom talked about you guys so much that we all feel that we know you. Hopefully, one day we will get to meet. But do know that your virtual family loves you and misses your Mom just as bad as you do. We will always be here for you and praying for and with you.


Love Always,

@DocBreezy08

Day 9: 31 Day Reset

I know I'm late in posting this but I wasn't quite done with it on yesterday and I wanted it to look nice and purty (in my southern drawl lol). So yesterday's activity was to make a life map. This was pretty cool. It really gives me something to look forward to. I have had so many small blessings to occur during this resetting of my life. Can't wait for what the days to follow are going to bring.  Here's my life map:

Until next time, God Bless!


With Love,

DocBreezy

Day 8: 31 Day Reset

Day of Gratitude

          Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.- 
          1 Thessalonians 5:18

"There are two ways to live: you can live as if nothing is a miracle or you can live as if everything is a miracle." - Albert Einstein

         

 
As I reflect on this task, I realize that I have so much to be thankful for. It is often times our minds are clouded by what we don't have that we lose sight of the many blessings that God has given us in this one day alone. Many times the small blessings are overlooked such as waking up in our right mind, having food, shelter, clothing. It is my belief that many of our blessings are blocked because we don't appreciate and can't handle the little things that God has blessed us with. I mean really, why would He bless us with millions of dollars when we can't even manage $10 (things that make you go hmmmm). So this week I'm going to challenge myself to show gratitude and have a spirit of thanksgiving when praying. Here goes my top 15 list of things that I'm grateful for in no particular order:

1. Life
2. Salvation
3. Family - biological, in-laws, church, JSU, AKA, etc
4. Friends
5. Food
6. Shelter
7. Husband
8. All 4 Seasons- even though in Mississippi we only have about 2.5 of them lol
9. Activity of my limbs
10. The laughs and smiles of my niece and nephew
11. The gift of Music
12. The gift to care for others
13. The cool breeze
14. Football
15. Health

I am truly thankful for every little blessing that God has blessed me with. I would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone big and small who has made a positive impact on my life. Thank you for your continued support, prayers, and encouragement. Without you, I wouldn't be who I am today. I love you guys. It is my dearest hope and prayer that I may be a blessing in your life. Until tomorrow....God Bless!

With Love,
DocBreezy 


P.S. Pics of a few people (I have so many more) that I am grateful for! I heart them very much!

Day 7: 31 Day Reset

Day of Rest

How fitting that the day of rest fell on the Lord's day!  First I would like to begin with some special shoutouts to my homies E money and Candy Bear for keeping me on track because I'm such a horrible procrastinator. Love you guys. Now, to the task at hand.

Today is a day of reflection and encouragement to other fellow resetters. Thus far I have learned about myself is that I have many visions and ideas but no clear cut plan of action. Also, procrastination is my best friend. I've known this for a long time but it's at an all time high now. *hangs head in shame* Finally, I learned that my literary game is on the come up. *WOOT WOOT* My favorite exercise this week was writing my personal mission statement. It was so empowering. It also helped to put my vision on paper so that I can have a constant reminder of who I want to become. The exercise that I struggled most with was envisioning my values in action. It's weird that I know what I want but have no clue on how to get there. I speculate that it's fear I'm facing and writing those things down made it real for me.

Welp, there you have it. Anyone who so happen to read this here blog, please feel free to comment, share, encourage, etc. It is my prayer that through my journey of resetting, I will be an inspiration and an encouragement to others. God Bless!

With Love,

DocBreezy

Day 6: 31 Day Reset

PERSONAL MISSION STATEMENT

I value learning, serving, peace, joy, family, traveling, salvation, and freedom. I absolutely love laughter (thank God for it!), food, music and friendships in my life. I also especially value helping others to reach their life's dreams and goals. Through my life, I want to emulate Christ's love, grace and mercy so that I may draw others to Him. I also want to be an inspiration and encouragement to others. As a scientist, mother, friend, and relative I will foster genuine love, compassion, and humility in all that I do. I will step out of the box and have no fear because God will never leave me nor forsake me, fully aware that all things I desire will be given by God in accordance to His will. I will allow God to lead me and listen carefully to what He expects of me. I will remember to enjoy the failures and smile in the face of adversity. I will choose joy and peace over sadness and confusion. I will accept every adversity as a challenge to allow God to use me for His glory. I will always keep love in my heart and prayer on my lips for all of God's creation. Failure is an option as long as I dust my shoulders off, keep my head up, take notes, review, and try again. Amen!




With love,

DocBreezy

Day 5: 31 Day Reset

I actually finished this on yesterday but am just now getting around to posting it. This activity really made me realize that I'm a lot closer to my ideal life than I think and that I've allowed some negative thinking and fear cloud my thoughts. *that right there deserves a shout* So the assignment was to rate my Reset 10 (will be in parenthesis) on a scale of 1-10 with 10 being ideal and 1 being not even close. Also, for your Reset 10, write at least 3 things that you are currently doing or need to do to make your value a 10. So here it is in no particular order:

Intimate relationship with Christ (5)
1. Studying God's word daily and applying it to my daily living
2. Morning and evening meditations/conversations with God
3. Obedience

Bringing souls to Christ (3)
1. Get over shyness/fear of talking to others *the ultimate nemesis*
2. Being an example of Christ
3. Telling others

Joy (5)
1. Happiness despite what is happening
2. Delight in the Lord
3. Achievements being met by myself or others

Peace (4)
1. Don't sweat the small stuff
2. No worrying *my nemesis for real whew*
3. Keep smiling throughout all adversity

Serving and helping others reach their life's goals (6)
1. Giving without expectation of receiving
2. Community service
3. Being an encouragement and inspiration to others.

Financial security (4)
1. Begin career/open business/write bestselling book
2. Investing (mutual funds, retirement fund, owning home, etc)
3. Sticking to budget

Healthy living (physical, mental, friendships, marital) (6)
1. Exercising
2. Healthy eating/portion size
3. Fostering healthy relationships

Family (8)
1. Reconnecting with family I've lost contact with
2. Encouraging activities that involve my family and my husband's family
3. Practicing open communication without judgement with all honesty

Fostering Love (6)
1. Unconditional
2. Patience
3. Kindness

Having Children  (1)
1. Preparing body, mind, spirit
2. Purchasing a house
3. Prayer for love, healthy children, healthy and loving family
4. Teamwork

The beginning......

With Love,
DocBreezy

Day 4: 31 Day Reset

Today I spent quite a while on today's task. There are many things that I value in life and it was hard to narrow it down to just 10. Despite my current misfortunes there are many things and people that are valuable in my life. Here are my RESET 10 in no particular order:

Intimate relationship with Christ

Bringing souls to Christ

Joy

Peace

Serving and helping others reach their life's goals

Financial security

Healthy living (physical, mental, friendships, marital)

Family

Fostering Love

Having Children

I had a longer list that also included starting career, wisdom, moving into new home, etc. I believe that if these top 10 are manifested then the others shall come. Given praises in advance for what God is about to do in my life. Be blessed y'all!

With much love,
DocBreezy

Day 3: 31 Day Reset

So today I am writing a love letter to 30 day old future me. I think I will continue this every 30 to 60 days to keep me accountable for the goals I set for myself. I am posting it on futureme.org as well so that it can be emailed to me in 30 days. I can't wait to see what God will show me and bless me with in these next 30 days. So here goes....

Dear future Jelani,


Congratulations on all the progress you've made so far over the past 30 days. God is truly moving in your life. It's crazy how many times you are the cause of your blocked blessings because you won't let go and let God (such a cliche' yet true). 


I'm finally (consistently) exercising 6 days a week. I am drinking 8 glasses of water a day and treating myself to one cup of sweet tea  a week (whew Lord help me). Those love handles and jiggly arms are disappearing. My gluteus isn't more maximus yet but you can sure bounce a quarter off of it because it's so toned! *giggles*


I am taking time out for meditation to make sure my plans are aligned with God's divine purpose. I am also actively writing that book that I've been talking about for almost 2 years now. Next stop Oprah's book club! *woot woot*  I am also putting my plan in  motion to start my natural hair care line and opening a natural hair care store in my hometown.


My marriage is greater than ever! I have finally let go of old baggage. I have also gotten rid of dead weight friendships in my life. I've also gotten rid of this clutter in my apartment. I'm finally free.


I am so proud of you for finally throwing away procrastination and adopting pro activeness. For God said if I seek Him first and His righteousness then all things that I could ever dream would be added unto me! I'm also proud that you are grateful for your current blessings and no longer complaining about what you don't have.


You are awesome for finally allowing God to truly use you! *high fives*




Love,


DocBreezy

Day 2: 31 Day Reset

Love/Hate Relationship with my life. Day 2 is a bit eye opening and depressing but here goes......

Lifestyle: I love that I'm able to travel. I dislike where I live and my living environment. I dislike that I lack energy and really don't feel like doing much of anything lately.

Work: I dislike not having a job. I have a B.S., M.S., Ph.D., and a certification and no job. *sigh* Being a housewife is a job in itself, however with no children it's pointless.

Education: I love that I achieved all of my educational goals. I dislike the degrees I've obtained. They seem worthless at this moment.

Finances: I love that the only debt that I currently have is student loans. I dislike that I have no source of income to pay these loans off. I dislike the lack of funds in my checking account and that I can't take care of myself.

Health: I love that I don't have any major health issues. I dislike my body. I want to melt away all the fat and make my gluteus more maximus! *giggles*

Family: I love my family relationships. I dislike that we don't do as much together anymore. I dislike that I don't have any children.

Relationships: I love my friendships and my marriage. I dislike that I'm passive when people irritate me.  I dislike that there are certain things that my husband and I bump heads on.

Well that's the end of day 2.....boy that was hard!



Peace Out
DocBreezy

Day 1: 31 Day Reset

Thanks to my friends E-Money and Candy Bear for introducing me to this challenge! I'm looking forward to what this challenge will instill in my life! So in my Chris Brown voice: Leh Go!


Mantra is: "Seek not power, but the power of love" -Minister Richard Wiggins

My Song: "Total Praise"- Richard Smallwood this song just takes me to a place of joy, peace, and happiness.

Notebook: A composition notebook with circles that symbolizes the the never ending circle of love and it's strength. Plus, we in a recession and this was the first unused notebook that I found. *giggles*







Peace Out
DocBreezy